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Preparing your teen for their first phone - The first-phone checklist

Preparing your teen for their first phone - The first-phone checklist

It all sounds simple enough, doesn't it? Preparing your teen for their first phone. The headline implies that there is a list, a plan, or even a template for getting it right. But let's be honest, this process is rarely that tidy.

That headline might make it seem like you, the parent or guardian, are the sole authority. But in reality, this is a journey you're embarking on together. It's not a one-sided conversation but a dialogue, ideally rooted in curiosity rather than control.

The instinct to lead with rules, bans, or one-way lectures can easily backfire. The oldest trick in the book, telling a teenager they can't do something, is often the fastest way to make them want it even more.

We need a smarter way. Because when it comes to teens and phones, while exciting at first, a phone for teenagers also brings up concern, questions and uncertainty for parents.

There's no single rulebook for tech and teens.

The so-called 'rulebook' for introducing tech to young people? It's not a one-size-fits-all guide. Every child, every teen, and every family are unique. What works for one person may not work for another.

However, what we can aim for is to help our children develop awareness, about smartphones, social media, and how these tools influence their time, attention, and identity.

We want them to develop an intentional relationship with tech. Not just be swept along by it.

 

Walk the walk-starting with yourself.

Teaching teens healthy smartphone habits is a lot like hearing those aeroplane safety instructions: 'Put your own mask on first.' You can't expect your teenager to unplug from the phone if you're constantly scrolling on your own. It's a challenge, but it's also a powerful opportunity to show them that you're making an effort, too.

Be honest about your own relationship with your phone. Admit when you're struggling. Make it a joint effort. There's strength in saying, "Hey, I'm figuring this out too" or "We dont need our phones, internet or any social media today".

Don't become that adult.

You know the one. The person you swore you'd never become:

"Back in my day, we didn't have all this TikTok nonsense-kids actually talked to each other!"

It's easy to become preachy or dismissive, especially when you're genuinely worried. However, if we want our message to resonate, we must make it relatable. And that means understanding what matters to them.

One of the best pieces of advice comes from Project Reboot founder Dino Ambrosi:

"I don't get through to teens by talking about mental health stats. But when I help them realise their time is being stolen-that they're handing over hours of their life to someone else's business model-that's when it lands."

(Read more)

Social media can feel abstract, but time is not. That's tangible. That's theirs.

Ask questions before handing over the phone.

Imagine you're a personal trainer. A new client walks in. Do you immediately throw a workout plan at them and expect results? Of course not. You get to know them-their background, mindset, goals, habits. The same applies here. Before giving your child their first phone, ask:

  • What excites you about getting a phone?
  • What apps or games do your friends talk about?
  • What do you think could be challenging?

Their answers might surprise you. They might reveal fears or hopes you didn't expect. Dino Ambrosi notes:

"Despite the negative aspects of social media, kids are using it in some amazing ways. If you cast a negative light on platforms like Instagram or TikTok, you lose credibility in your kid's eyes."

Be curious, not dismissive.

Dr Rangan Chatterjee's practical tips for parents

Dr Rangan Chatterjee, a father of two and a leading voice in the Smartphone Free Childhood movement, emphasises the importance of open communication. He puts it like this6:

"We're all just doing our best in a brand-new world we didn't grow up in."

Here are his 5 key tips for navigating the first phone decision:

  1. Educate yourself on the impact of smartphones on mental health, sleep, and concentration. The Channel 4 documentary Swiped is a good starting point.
  2. Talk openly with your child. Share your concerns and listen to theirs. Frame the decision as one rooted in care, not control.
  3. Focus on gains mindful use gives rather than losses. Mindful phone use means more time for hobbies, friendships, and independent growth.
  4. Join forces with other parents. The Parent Pact encourages waiting until at least Year 9 to give a smartphone. You can connect locally and reduce peer pressure together, finding a joint plan that suits your situation.
  5. Remember that delaying isn't denying. Many families begin with a phone tailored for young minds, such as the HMD Fusion X1, and revisit smartphones later when the child is better equipped.

For families thinking about the best phone for teens or even a phone without internet, these principles can help shape a smoother, more intentional transition into tech.

A responsible alternative to a phone for teenagers: HMD Fusion X1

Speaking of that alternative, the newly launched HMD Fusion X1, developed by HMD in collaboration with Xplora, is a responsible and natural option. It looks and feels like a "real" smartphone but comes with powerful parental controls, pre-approved contacts, screen time limits, and location tracking. Plus, it's repairable at home, a win for sustainability.

As pioneers in child-safe tech, HMD helped shape the first smartphone built specifically for kids. Their commitment to online safety for teens and initiatives like The Better Phone Project laid the groundwork for the development of the first phone for kids in fusion X1. 

For families exploring a phone for teenagers without internet or moderate amount of control. Fusion X1 offers a smart, balanced choice built with both independence and protection in mind as the perfect choice.

Smartphone Free Childhood calls it "a promising step forward in child-safe smartphones."

Because the goal isn't to keep kids offline forever. It's to help them build the skills and resilience they'll need once they are online.

Bibliography

  1. Smartphone Free Childhood. [10 tips for parents]. PDF file. Accessed June 17, 2025. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1nGgUe3wrz72qxLtFN-m1ARpDEgecD7d1/view

  2. Smartphone Free Childhood. "Alternatives." Accessed June 17, 2025. https://www.smartphonefreechildhood.org/alternatives.

  3. Project Reboot. "Advice for Discussing Screen Time from a Former Tech-Addicted Teen." Project Reboot. Accessed June 17, 2025. https://www.projectreboot.school/post/advice-for-discussing-screen-time-from-a-former-tech-addicted-teen.

  4. Project Reboot. "Are You Overpaying for Social Media?" Project Reboot. Accessed June 17, 2025. https://www.projectreboot.school/post/are-you-overpaying-for-social-media.

  5. Smartphone Free Childhood. "How Do I Talk to My Year 7/8/9 Child About Delaying Smartphones?" Smartphone Free Childhood. Accessed June 17, 2025. https://www.smartphonefreechildhood.org/resource/how-do-i-talk-to-my-year7-8-9-child-about-delaying-smartphones.

  6. Smartphone Free Childhood. "Time Is Precious: The Key Message That Connects with Older Kids." Smartphone Free Childhood. Accessed June 17, 2025. https://www.smartphonefreechildhood.org/resource/time-is-precious-the-key-message-that-connects-with-older-kids.

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